We Don't Go to School

Guess how many days I taught in January.  Go ahead, I'll wait....


(Random dogs courtesy of the internet). 

...just like Bruce Willis in that hugging commercial yesterday...


(What even is the internet.)

The answer is 13.  Or maybe 12.  Now I can't remember but it wasn't very many.  Basically it will snow one inch and then we won't go to school and then we will have a two hour delay then a day of school then four days off etc.  I think we might still be in school on the 4th of July.

You know what's cool though?  This weekend my dad got his hearing aids.  He's been shooting his whole life and listening to his music too loud and all that business.  And now he can hear Tori.  Tori is extremely quiet and he's needed a translator (one of the other adults or kids) to tell him what she says.  And now he can hear her.  Isn't that touching?  He also says he can hear how his own voice sounds for the first time in many years.  I teared up right in the middle of my pizza.



The end.

School Whining and Judy Clocks

Just over three weeks ago the copier broke at school.  It took them almost two week to fix it.  Meanwhile we were encouraged to "think digitally" and pay for our own copies at Staples.  When they finally fixed the copier it broke again a day and a half later (not an exaggeration).  They fixed that after one day, but then we weren't allowed to print anything except for report cards for another four days.  Grrr.

Also this morning this was as functional as my computer got.  It actually ended up getting worse.  As someone who depends on their smartboard and really likes to stay caught up with her email I was kind of distressed.

Also it's going to be a few days before they're able to start fixing it (whatever the problem is) so I have to rewrite my sub plans that I thought I was being so awesome by making this weekend. 

Ok, the whining part is over.  Now I want to talk a second about how weird and nerdy I am and Judy clocks.  You know these ones?

                                             

I'm pretty every elementary school kid in the history of America has used these when they were learning to tell time.  My students have started playing with them during class breaks, recess, and while they're waiting for the bus.  They often play a game that involves winding the clock either forward or backward to time travel.  I started thinking about this game more than I should because my mind is strange.  Then I wondered, what if Judy clocks really could cause time travel? 

Suppose every time a kid turned a Judy clock forward or backward time moved forward or backward without anyone's knowledge (including the child's).  The backward motion wouldn't repeat as they got to the same moment again (meaning that if a kid wound the clock backwards the world wouldn't be eternally stuck in a loop from however far back the kid wound the clock to the clock winding -- does that make sense?).  Anyway, supposing that rule was the case do you think overall in the history of Judy clocks we would have a net time travel into the future or into the past?  

Why has this been on my mind frequently for the past four or so days? 

Lonely

I'm a lonely person.  I have been for years, but now is a particularly hard time.

It's not popular to talk about these kinds of things on the internet.  People see it as begging for attention or something else inherently negative.  I don't think we need to think of it that way.  Why aren't all human emotions valid?

Sure, it's more fun to read about someone's awesome party or hilarious mishap.  But other types of posts acceptable as well.  Serious in all forms.  In fact, those are usually the posts I prefer to read -- people's honest opinions or reasonings on life or admission of troubles.  It makes it easier to connect to those people and see them as human.  

So here I am.  I'm a lonely human.  Just thought I'd let you know. 

The Cheese Sandwich Kids

Check out this extremely unappetizing cheese sandwich.



This is a picture from a stranger on the internet, but it looks almost identical to what the cheese sandwich kids get to have for lunch.

So here's the deal.  At my school if kids don't bring lunch money they can charge their lunch.  But if they owe too much their lunch gets taken away and they get a cold cheese sandwich very similar to the one pictured above (but usually on a skinny bun because childhood obesity) and milk.  Last year I had a kid whose mom didn't send him lunch money often so I'd occasionally put money in his account (secretly).  Because getting your lunch taken away in front of everyone after you've already filled your tray is mortifying.

This year one of my students wrote in his journal that the worst part of school was when you have to get a cheese sandwich at lunch.  And then it happened to him the other day because he owed $9 or so in charged lunches.  And he wouldn't look at or talk to anyone for the rest of the day. I gave him an extra apple and cheese stick that I had, but the whole situation was awful.

My mom and sister won't let me talk to them about this because it's heartbreaking.  So I'm coming to the internet.  What do I do (or what is the solution) to the problem of the cheese sandwich kids?  Do I throw money in the lunch accounts when I know they're getting low?  I stopped doing it last year after I was out about $60.  Or do I just ignore it?  Should the cafeteria just suck it up and let them charge indefinitely? Or what?

I know the theory is that if they get a cheese sandwich then they'll finally remember to tell their parents, but that usually doesn't work.  Is it really the kid's fault?  I really do want to know what you think.

Praying

Did you ever play this game when you were a kid?  The commercial made it seem like it would be the best thing in the whole entire earth. 

  

My cousin had it and we played a few times.  I'm still not very sure how many "levels" there were or what the point was because it was insanely frustrating.  Pikachu rarely actually understood what you told it to do and then you just threw the microphone because you had plenty of time to gather the ingredients for the soup, but the dumb thing couldn't understand what you were saying.  

Anyway, the actual play screen looked like this. 

See that little guy with the bubble in the bottom right corner?  The bubble came up when you pressed and held the button to talk to Pikachu.  Press button, speak into microphone, release button, bubble flies over and tells Pikachu what you said (if I remember correctly).  Also if you held the button down too long the bubble would eventually burst.  

Well, pretty much every time I pray I have this image in my head.  I'm aware it's weird.  I think I've only mentioned this to anyone one time (and that may be an imagined conversation, I'm not sure).  Press button (Dear Heavenly Father), bubble forms as you speak/think your prayer, release button (amen), bubble floats off for your prayer to be heard.  And if you fall asleep in the middle of your prayer or get distracted because you are exhausted then the bubble bursts and the prayer doesn't work and you have to start over. 

The end.

P.S. I know that's not how prayer actually works. 

Buffy and Edward (I hate myself for this post)

As the title suggests, I hate myself for writing this post.  But it won't get out of my head so here it comes.

Over the weekend SyFy had a Buffy marathon (and it was a kick-ass marathon with all your favorite and most important episodes including "Hush" and "Once More With Feeling" and "Becoming" (parts 1 and 2), etc.).  Naturally I recorded everything I could (except for when a storm knocked out the directv for a few hours) and have been watching over the past few days.

And I couldn't help but think about this thing that was popular on the internet a few years ago.

And I just don't think it's right.  Buffy has a history of being lenient towards vampires with good intentions (like...Angel? he had a soul) even when they were actually kind of evil, but harmless (think our neutered friend from later seasons who I won't  name because I know Megan is currently watching the series).  That vampire didn't even have a soul, but couldn't hurt humans so Buffy allowed it (intentional gender neutral pronoun) to live.  

Anyway, if this was all real Buffy totally wouldn't kill Edward, literary quality aside.  She tries to do what's right and let live those things that aren't a threat to human beings.

And that is all. 

Like I said, this is embarrassing to write. Feel free to silently mock me. 

P.S. Buffy + Angel forever

Racism is a Sad Reality

Racism is a hot topic right now.  From the mess happening on Big Brother 15 to the Zimmerman trial.  The discussion is everywhere.  I don't want to talk about either of those things.  I want to talk about the reality of racism in every day life.

This is my dad.

He's a nice enough guy and a professional, but he's kind of scary looking if you don't know him.  He has the beard and his eyes don't open equally (Bell's Palsy).  He's large and when he rides his motorcycle he usually wears a leather vest.  

Once upon a time Dad was on his motorcycle going about 20 over in front of a school.  He got stopped and he was carrying a loaded pistol in his pocket and didn't have his concealed carry permit with him.  After asking him about his gun and why he was going so fast the officer gave him a warning and let him go. 

This is my brother-in-law Billy.

Tall, thin (but strong), well-groomed black man.  This outfit is as casual as he gets.  No kidding, Billy is FANCY.  

Nearly every time Billy gets stopped by a traffic cop they ask him to get out of the car.  Now, he's very careful.  He turns off his car, puts his keys on the dashboard and hands on the wheel.  He asks permission before reaching for his registration and explains exactly where his license is before taking his wallet from his pocket. 

Once in college he was handcuffed and held on the hood of a car (he still has some scarring from the burns) until the ran his ID and realized who he was. 

Now tell me racism isn't real.  Tell me these discussions are overblown.  No.  It's not ok that you're racist against a certain group because of where you're from.  It's not ok to use a racial slur just because no one from the group it refers to is present.  

I want to make it clear that I'm not saying we have to be ultra PC all the time.  I told my students that my brother-in-law was black and they told me to stop being racist.  That's not racism and that level of sensitivity needs to be eliminated, but this is a real thing that real people are dealing with daily.  And it's not fair.