Trying to Be a Better Teacher

I've been trying to get my life together as it relates to my job.  I love teaching, but it's extremely high stress and there are lots of pressures other than the whole 17 third graders thing (Utah teachers, don't hate me for that class size).

And it's been working a little bit.  My lesson plans are working out.  I successfully used the phrases "giant ray of death", "giant line segment of death", and "giant angle of death" in  my math lesson today and it was awesome.  Turns out you're lucky if your house is built at the vertex of the giant angle of death because the rays only hit Mars and the Sun and you're ok.

The point is, I've been trying to be a better teacher and it's working for the most part.

But I can't get my own life together.  I don't stop and visit the kids and Heather (family, duh) because I need to hurry home and grade, plan, prepare, etc.  There's no time to go sit on the couch with Mom and watch Criminal Minds.  Sleep is trying it's best to go away (about 4 hours a night).  And I'm a huge anti-social loser.

The end.

Lincoln

I don't like to apologize for not blogging, but I will apologize now that I have no funnies to blog lately.  This post is definitely not embarrassing like the previous few, but it's not funny.

Several weeks ago I gave an assignment to my students to explain what they thought the following quote from Abraham Lincoln meant, in their own words.

"In giving freedom to the slave, we assure freedom to the free."

Some of them did quite poorly on this assignment and didn't take it seriously at all.  I did, however, get a few that I thought were poignant and beautiful (all punctuation is theirs).

From Abbie: "What I think it means is that Americans are all ready free, but slaves live in America and are Americans and are not free.  So, if Americans all of them black and white are free, they give freedom to the real America"

From Courtney: "By giving freedom to one race, we are really giving freedom to all man kind, because we are all the same."

And my favorite, from Martin: "I think by giving freedom to the people who were slaves well for example if it was like this umm the slaves were like the ones working and the others were like inside the whole time and never did anything.  So the slaves got freedom and the people who were free had been free to go outside to do work that's is how the frees got way more free by working and not being lazy that is what I think."

Can we talk about this for a minute?  I definitely wasn't looking for this answer, but the concept is absolutely astounding.  To this kid, it's in work that we are made more free.  I'm going to leave you now to interpret as you will.

Two Tales from School

I have a lovely student named M----- in my fifth grade class.  It's kind of obvious that he's the studly one in the class (at least half of my girls have admitted to me that they have a crush on him) and he's and overall nice, smart kid.  I wanted to share two quick stories that kind of show M-----'s personality.

One: I had a student named A----- in my class (she has since moved).  A----- and M----- were "going out" for awhile.  No, I still don't know (and didn't know when I was 10) what exactly that entails except that A----- was M-----'s girlfriend and all the girls were jealous.  Good thing about it was that A----- was a very friendly girl so all the others still liked her.  On her last day right before she left there was a somber mood in the classroom as everyone said goodbye.  Right as she was walking out M----- called to me "Hey, Miss Budd, listen to this!  Bye A-----, I love you."  You can mock the kid if you want (though don't do it around me because I might punch you in the face), but in his precious little 11 year old heart he did (does) love this girl and went out on a limb to tell her so.  It was extremely precious and I had to try not to tear up.  No, I don't think they'll continue to see each other or grow up and get married, but for now he loved her and that's enough.

Two: Last week was the week from hell aka parent teacher conferences.  Don't get me wrong, I love to meet with and talk to the parents but I spent two evenings at the school until almost 8 o'clock which makes for very long and tiring days.  M----- was my very last conference and came with both his parents and both of his step-parents.  You could tell he was really feeling the pressure (and I joked that I could go get his reading teacher if he wanted just to add to it).  In March the fifth graders have maturation (sex ed) and I had to get parents to sign the forms.  M-----'s dad turned and looked at him and asked if he wanted to go.  M----- said he didn't care.  His step-mom asked if he knew what it was about and M----- said without thinking, "Yeah, penis."  He then proceeded to bury his head under the table and groan and be embarrassed.  "Oh my gosh, why did I say that in front of my teacher?"  I had to try hard not to laugh (and maybe did a little).  The next day he mentioned two or three more times how horrified he was and apologized.

You know what?  I kind of like being a fifth grade teacher.

Definitely a Shame Spiral

About a week and a half ago I was in the midst of a shame spiral, as my friend Brittany terms it.  I'd had a bad day at work.  I was still struggling to adapt to my apartment.  I was flat broke, but luckily I'd found 40 bucks in a bank account I rarely used.  I went to the grocery store in a shirt that looked two sizes too big (it was actually only once size too big) and gym shorts.  My hair was a hot mess and I was in quite a bad mood.  I had necessities to buy and wasn't really in the mood to be there.  I got my necessities and a couple of groceries and also placed some raw chocolate chip cookie dough into my basket with no intentions of baking it.  You know what eating raw cookie dough makes you feel like?  Simultaneously you feel like it was the best idea ever and you hate yourself.  It was one of those days, you know?  I was walking through the parking lot back to my car with my phone tucked into my bra and it started ringing.  Seriously?  The one time my hands are full my phone is going to ring?  I was pissed, saw it wasn't a number I recognized, but decided to answer it anyway.  It was a principal from an interview I'd gone to earlier that day.  "Great," I thought.  I just interviewed today and they're already telling me they picked someone else.

Not so.  I GOT THE JOB!  Hello, this is only my lifelong dream to be a teacher.  Now I've got one week under my belt teaching fifth grade and it's awesome.  After the first day I almost cried because it was a disaster, but it's gotten much better.  I really think I'm good at this job.  I'm still adapting to the learning curve, but it's not as bad as I expected it to be.  The kids are great (even though I have a few difficult ones) and I really enjoy this job.  That's what picking a career is all about, yeah?

Brain Vomit

I'm watching musical Grey's Anatomy right now. It's only a few minutes in and I have to admit, I kind of like it.

Somehow I just discovered Grooveshark about last week. What the heck.

The way things were stacking up it seemed like last week was going to be miserable (major TMI moment coming up). It was just a lot of stress all combining and even the little things were going wrong. Then when I woke up on Monday morning to a visit from Aunt Flo (I just said that, get over it) I was pissed. Later, during lunchtime, I decided I could be pissed about it or I could be happy that it wasn't next week during mine and Sarah's trip. Thursday I had two formal observations. Crap shoot, I know. Instead of freaking out I just rocked my lesson and the CFA didn't have any suggestions to make. I want to teach so badly. The end.

When we were little and had a treat/dessert most often it was either Chips Ahoy (in the blue bag) or Oreos. That doesn't mean my mom was a bad mom, she was busy working and sometimes store bought cookies are just dandy. Also, I have no doubt that my mom's pie can rock your mom's pie any day of the week. Anyway, I was always partial to the Chips Ahoy and I'm wondering how the general populace would vote between the two.

Remember back in the days of summer (and I think once after that too) I blogged about the books I'd read? It's been awhile, but I'm still reading. Instead I post those on one of my other blogs that I write with a few friends (here). You may want to check it out because I'm thinking of doing a book giveaway soon.

That's all my random thoughts for right now.

A Poem

Here is a poem I wrote to model using similes and metaphors.

March Madness

Spring is a basketball game.

Spring brings the rain like Jimmer dropping threes.

The jumping players spring up like flowers and trees.

Bouncing balls, birds calling, fans yelling.

Everybody and everything start to warm up.

The other team emerges scared from the locker room,

shivering like a baby chick, just hatched.

Spring and basketball,

My favorites.

Stop judging me. I definitely wrote this on the fly while in the middle of a lesson and the kids contributed.

Fourth Grade Thus Far

I started in my fourth grade class on Monday. I sure do miss my sixth graders, but fourth will be good. Here are reasons to love them already.

-There is a black girl. I miss black people in my life. Not to mention she's as sweet as pie.

- There is a kid named Jackson and a kid named Noah (great men's basketball team names).

- All of my students are at or above level in reading (this is unheard of for the classes I've been in so far).

- My mentor teacher is amazing.

-There's a saucy redhead in my class. It's like having a little Sarah around sometimes.

- My kids love BYU sports. One wrote a name tag to cover his that said "Jimmer Fridet #32." That kid is a bamf.

-Several of my students remind me of my cousins when they were little and spunky.

BYU Mentors

My students have mentoring every Friday up on BYU campus. Today we were in the Garden Court at the Wilk for a presentation by the Break-Dance club. The kids thought David Dekker was my boyfriend because I gave him a hug. I miss BYU so much it hurts my heart.