Engagement...Wait, What?

So, I get a text message from Sean today that asked if I could help him out with something at five. I said sure thing and asked what was going on. Sean said he was doing something to surprise Jaimie and he needed my help. I agreed and he picked me up at five. We made a little small talk when I got into the car and then down to business. I asked what sort of surprise he was planning. First he made me promise about a thousand times that I wouldn't think he was crazy. After I had promised as many times he told me. "We're going ring shopping." Wait, what!? I had a spaz attack, but tried to calm down. I told Sean I did like him and etc. etc. and then tried to return to small talk (which is impossible to focus on when one of your best friends is supposedly getting engaged and you're going ring shopping). The whole thing just kept coming up and I was kind of freaking out. We eventually pull into apparently the only strip mall in the Provo/Orem area without a jewelry store. I told Sean I thought we were in the wrong place and so we parked and he said he'd call his dad. He dials and says "Hey, where are you?" Then I hear a voice behind me say, "In the back seat." Once again, wait, what?! I turn around and there's Jaimie buried under a blanket and boxes etc.! Turns out they had to trick me so they could take me to dinner (for my birthday). Then we all went to dinner at Applebee's (even before I sufficiently calmed down to be in a public place). It was delicous and a nice treat. Don't I have great friends (that I'm going to kill)?

A Progression of Swearing

I hope this doesn't get too personal and freak you guys out. Just a disclaimer there to start. When I was growing up, swearing was not ok. You would get your mouth washed out with soap if you even said crap. That became ok and metriculated (is that how you spell that?) into my daily usage sometime around fourth or fifth grade and my parents as well as we grew up and my little brother was too little (we thought) to understand. Hearing my dad swear was a huge surprise and we knew we were in trouble and my mom swore even less often, meaning basically never.

When I got into fifth grade, I developed a bad swearing habit. I basically sounded like a sailor whenever I talked and didn't hesitate to call my classmates the 'b' word or anything else (though I never said the 'f' word). I think at this point I've realized some of the reasons why this came about, but that's a different story. This habit continued in sixth and seventh grade. Then I started growing up. I started caring about the church and the commandments and all of that important stuff. I started realizing how significant everything was and I stopped swearing. I abhorred even the thought of swearing (though I still struggled to remove those words from the vocabulary of my mind as I thought).

Right about this time, my father's swearing in general became more frequent and more prevalent and has since continued to my mother (though she's not near as bad). Now it seems like my dad can barely go one sentence without using a swear word. Throughout high school I continued to refuse to swear, not even saying things like 'piss.'

Then I came to college. Last year I was pretty good and it shocked me when my room mates swore singing along to a song! Somehow, somewhere, I lost all of that. The summertime brought 'piss' into my vocabulary and fall brought 'douche bag'. You know from my New Year's resolutions post that I'm trying to get rid of those two, but there is a whole different problem I'm facing. I seriously am asking for help here. I have become generally satisfied and not shocked by swearing. In songs (and I sometimes sing along but only to hell), and when my friends and family say it. Last night I said hell in a context I didn't really like to refer to a character in a show's surprise. I'm working on it, but is there any way to restore this sensitivity? I miss it now that it's gone.

I hope I haven't offended anyone by the content or context of this post. It was in no way intended to. I'm also not trying to come off as self-righteous.

A Media Break

I was going to post tonight and I do have something to talk about, but I got distracted with failblog. I found this video and I am probably a nerd, but I think it is hysterical. With that, I leave you with a media break.

Things About Virginia I Will Miss This Summer

This is (as the title implies) a list of things I will miss when I am not at home in Virginia this summer.
1) My mother. I love my mom. We fight sometimes (rarely), but I can say with all honesty that she probably is [one of] my best friends. I don't really care much how cliche and ridiculous that sounds to you, it's the truth.
2) Seeing my father. My father is hard to live with (though I love him). It will still be hard to go a whole year without seeing him.
3) Carl's Ice Cream. A little ice cream stand in down town Fredericksburg that usually has an hour long line (especially on a friday night), but it's the best soft serve around.
4) Motorcycle rides with my dad. My dad got a new motorcycle (it's really pretty) and I'm not a huge fan of them, but in the summer there is something wonderful about being in that open air on a long ride on shaded back roads.
5) My grandmother's too cold air conditioning. Mammaw's house is always colder than any other house around. She's addicted to air conditioning and there's nothing like coming out of the heat into her house.
6) Destiny. My 5 year old niece and one of my best friends. She's absolutely beautiful and I love an miss her.
7) Gabriel. My 3 (almost 4) year old nephew and a stud. This kid has so much energy and never quits. I love him.
8) Playing in the baby pool with the kids. There is something so fun about surprising a child and sitting down in their pool with all your clothes on. I know this seems simple, but it's important to me.
9) Impromptu dinner parties with the neighbors. On summer nights (especially Sunday's) it seems like the whole street starts grilling at one time and some magic happens and we all end up sharing and eating together.
10) Laurel's house. I loved visiting Laurel randomly this summer and going over to hyperion and just chilling for hours doing nothing with her and Dave.
11) Crickets. Do they have crickets here? I don't even know. I just love to hear the sound of the crickets at night. Even through closed windows. Ditto lightening bugs. (Seriously, if somone familiar with Utah could let me know about this, that'd be great).
12) Wading in streams/rivers. A pivotal part of my childhood. I didn't do much of it this past summer, but now I'm going to miss it a lot.
13) Fishing with Dad and Glenn. They've got a lot more stamina when it comes to this than I do, but it's still so much fun. Especially when the kids come along and you watch their faces.
14) Sudden thunderstorms. You can be having a sunny beautiful day and then BAM all of a sudden the clouds roll in and it's pouring down rain. That's when you go out and dance barefoot in the street with all your clothes on. The smell and feel of the air just before is amazing.
15) Heat lightning. I'm guessing the drier air doesn't have enough friction or something to have this out here, but I will miss it.
16) Thunder that wakes you up/keeps you up at night. I love that thunder that literally shakes the whole house because it's so loud. It's absolutely beautiful.
17) Tornado warnings. They don't usually do much damage in my area (last year they did wreak a little havoc), but there is something exciting about the anticipation.
18) Nights when the power goes out because of a storm. I don't know why this is exciting. I love hunting for the candles and eating all the ice cream with spoons from the container so that it doesn't go to waste. I love when everyone gets too hot in their beds so they move to sleep on the cool tile until the air conditioning works again.
19) Hot wind. As much as I hate the humidity, there is something so amazing about the hot wind that will blow through every once in awhile.
20) Intense wind. Along with the thunderstorms comes the crazy wind that makes the trees look like they are going to fall right down. Also, microbursts (until they cause too much damage).
21) My other siblings. Swinging on the swing in the backyard together or laying in the hammock, or just chatting. I do love all of them.
22) Beth. One of my best friends from high school that's still in Virginia. I miss that girl.
23) Family ward. I love that we have to sit in the back of the cultural hall extension to the chapel because the kids are too noisy and that all the little ones play with cars and eating lunch with the Kalamas etc.
24) Beach trips. Even if just for a weekend I love that 5-7 hour drive with the family and lounging in the sand and seeing the ocean and smelling the pier and the crusty motel one street back and everything about the beach.

Ok, I know a lot of these are weather related and some you probably think are really silly. The reality is, these are important things to me. Things I will miss all summer long. It's going to be hard for me to be here in Provo, but I'm going to try to make the best of it. Any suggestions for the must-have experiences of a summer in Provo?

Of People

As part of my new not judging thing, I've been thinking a lot about people. People both as individuals and as the collective whole. These are a few thoughts that have arisen.
A lot of the time I say that I hate people. I think this is probably fairly common (at least it is among those that I encounter most often). I really, though, don't know why that is. Why is it that I say I hate people? Is it the compulsory conversation filler, such as the traditional, "I'm sooo tired"? Who knows. The question is, do I really hate people?

I'm inclined to say no. I probably really like people. I have some evidence. When groups are chatting and laughing loudly in the terrace by the cougareat, I love it. It makes me happy. This is possibly why I study the best there (also, the dull roar of noise). Also, and probably most convincingly, I love to hear stories. I want people to tell me about growing up and their favorite memory and their saddest memory and their pets and why they picked their major and what is their major and how they like their room mates and about their worst break up and favorite Christmas and on and on to infinity. I really enjoy this no matter the circumstances, but I'm often hesitant to ask any (much less all of these questions) because I'm afraid people will think I'm nosey. Maybe I am, but I love to hear about people's lives.

There are times, though, that people drive me absolutely nuts. I'm still working on the judging thing, so I'll try not to go much into that (like how I hate when people don't keep the dress and grooming standards (especially leggings under short dresses) and other terribly judgmental things). I hate when people purposely hurt other people. I can't stand lying. And downright meanness drives me crazy. I'm probably not one to talk about any of these things (except the tights ;)), but that's just how I think.

I may have bored you to death with this post, but that doesn't matter too much. I wasn't trying to and I really wanted to blog about people, so I get to :). Have a beautiful day and tell me your stories!

The Rise of Evil

Moving on, the rise of evil. Maybe I'm being a little dramatic, but I have a feeling that that's not actually the case and this is more of a problem than many of us would like to admit (not a personal problem, a world problem, just read the rest before you get all indignant). So, I was reading an interview Ben Crowder did about his magazine Mormon Artist. The interview was good. The interview did metion, however, a website for some other LDS art called Images of the Restoration. I thought this would be right up my alley! The restoration is one of my favorite topics (before I continue, let me note that in the interview, Ben did say that he did not appreciate the art there because it was not uplifting, but I thought maybe this was more of a preference based thing). So, I go to the website and start looking at the art (which seemed a little strange) and began reading the story about the first piece. I was enraged (and trying desperately to contain the literal growl that was threatening to escape)! The stuff was parading as LDS art of some sort, but that was some anti work if I've ever seen it. I always thought that if I came across anti-Mormon literature (or in this case, artwork) I would recognize it immediately and not even be tempted to look. Not the case in this situation.

What did I learn? Two things. One: Ben has good judgment so if he says the art isn't uplifting then I probably should have listened in the first place. Two: I feel like we keep getting more and more entrenched in this battle between good and evil and evil is parading (successfully) as good. We (I) have to be so careful, or we'll get stuck. This scares me. A lot.

Next post (so I can remember, because I come up with ideas frequently and then forget them): people.

Here It Is!

Finally, the long awaited New Year's Resolution post. I know it's February, but this is my blog and I can do whatever I want of course.

1. Stop spelling out swears when I want to say them

2. Stop saying piss

3. Stop saying douche bag and douche canoe

4. Stop judging people

5. Write in my journal at least once a week, preferably more (in a word document)

6. Read more for fun

Ok, that's all (or at least all I can remember). You might think this is a sissy list, but I think these are important things. Ben inspired me to do a review of how well I'm doing once a month. Then I can remember. (By the way, if you're not a friend of Ben's, you should check out his blog anyway because it's pretty interesting).

1-3: I'm doing better. It's still hard when I'm angry or upset (especially while watching BYU screw up in sports), but it is getting a little better. Also, number 3 is particularly bad when I am ranting about guys. Go figure.

4: This one I'd forgotten about until about two weeks ago. Do you know how hard this is? Especially if you've made up your mind what you think of someone. I'm struggling here, but working.

5: Uh...I haven't done this at all. Starting off the year without a computer didn't help. Maybe it will happen. I hope so.

6: I am reading more for fun. It's still not a lot. My classes this semester are basically killing me, but I will hopefully survive. It doesn't leave a whole ton of time for reading, but I just bought some cute little editions of Pride and Prejudice, Jane Eyre, and Wuthering Heights. They have those nice ribbon book marks in them that I love. Hopefully this will inspire me. Plus they're small so I could carry them around quite easily.

Ok world, that's all for today. I know you're all so excited to finally get to read this post. Sorry for the delay!

A New Idea

This picture is not as random as it seems.

What do we do more than a whole lot of other stuff? That's right folks, we text. And the title of this post is also associated with this. I don't know if I'm creative enough to try to pull together this idea, but if it works I'd like to make a few...trial runs? That's not the word I'm looking for, something like prototype or the like. Anyway, the point is that if I can get creative enough to make a few samples then I think maybe I can get something started. I'm just not sure I have the skills.

More info to come.