I Feel Nauseous

I want to make it clear that this is not a personal attack in any way shape or form.  *Ahem* moving on.

Yesterday a friend of mine pinned this picture on Pinterest.

On first glance, I'm ok with this.  That's a pretty good motto to actually work instead of just complaining.  Can I stop here and tell you that I'm aware that I don't have a good pretty body and I probably never will?  I just felt that was relevant.  

Then I actually looked at this picture and I hated it.  Is this girl healthy thin or is she overly thin?  I'm sure some people have bodies where the shape and weight of the girl in this picture is ok.  Maybe.  Now I'm less sure.  Can you see that her hip bones are actually holding her underwear away from her body?  I've never seen that before in my life.  Is this the standard for having a good body?  Gah.  I don't usually complain about magazine covers and movie stars' thinness, but this is too much for me.  

I decided to research this picture a little bit rather than just rant and it just got worse and worse.  The girl who writes the blog/tumblr that this picture came from is not tiny thin.  She's working on losing weight and exercising more (which I fully support), but her motivational pictures are awful. 

(she actually got this picture from a different girl's blog that's focusing on starving herself and says "if your stomach is grumbling it means you're succeeding")

I'm going to stop posting these because they make me hate myself and hate everyone else. 

A Collection of Random Thoughts

My life is insanely busy these days.  I am teaching and it is exhausting and rewarding and the best thing ever (aside from Harry Potter and BYU sports).

Something that is absolutely disgusting that you might not think about: steaming football players.  Please allow me to explain.  The last two home games have been exceedingly cold.  They have the heaters set up on the sidelines and all the fans are wearing four thousand layers (which gives you negative chest points).  Then one of the linemen comes off the field and removes his helmet, and you see more than his breath.  You see steam coming off of his head and neck and it is so gross.  Without seeing it, it's hard to understand how disgusting it actually is. Ok, I'll stop now.

Listen, I know you'll think I'm crazy but I can recognize Jimmer based on the way he moves his body.  Jimmer hangs out on the field during the football games and during the last few games he's been hidden under various layers of clothes and hats.  Usually I just look for him standing near Whitney before the game, but then there's so many people to watch (Andrew Rich, Riley Nelson, etc etc) and I lose sight of him among all the other people dressed in navy and gray.  Except that I can find Jimmer.  I've spent so much time watching Jimmer play and be on the sidelines and interviews and stuff, that I can tell it's him just by the way he moves his head and body.  Go ahead and laugh at my insanity, but it's the truth.

I've added something to the mental pseudo-list I have about future boyfriends/spouse.  It is important that the person knows how to use a well placed swear.  Some people swear gratuitously (I think I might be one of them) and some people don't swear at all (which I respect, but I think it might be a little up-tight).  However, the ability to confidently use a swear word on appropriate occasions is something I find attractive in a man.  Now judge me.

I guess I should just quit blogging while I'm not even really ahead, but before I get further behind.

What My Parents Did

Wal-Mart came to my school on Friday to do a quick assembly that was essentially them trying to get us to love Wal-Mart.  It was mostly pointless, but 10 teachers were chosen by random drawing to get a $100 dollar gift card to buy things for their classroom.  I'll be honest, I was hoping to be chosen, but wasn't bitter when I wasn't.  In the teacher's lounge during lunch people were talking about what they'd spend theirs on and they weren't exactly sure what they'd want to buy had they won or anything.  I, however, knew exactly what I wanted.  Art supplies for my kids.  

Thanks to a generous mom we have a whole load of construction paper which is helpful.  Our class also has some off brand markers and colored pencils along with glue because of 1 cent back to school deals at various stores.  A previous teacher left a tray of crayons and I donated what art supplies I had at home (except for anything glass, my nice watercolors, and a hot glue gun) to the classroom.  We were doing ok.  Thing is, art is extremely important to me (to make a well rounded person, to give a chance for kids that don't succeed and thrive academically to be the best, etc) and I wanted to have the opportunity to do amazing things this year.

I told all the previous to my mom when chatting with her Friday evening (yes, I still talk to my mom every day).  The next morning I got a text message at about 7:30, "Up?"  Rather than reply I just called her and asked what she wanted (in a nice way, I promise).  "Congratulations, you win a $150 gift card."  I had only been awake about five minutes at this point and was confused, "Huh?"  "You win $150 dollars courtesy of dad and mom to buy art supplies for your classroom!"  Being an eloquent and intelligent human being I naturally replied, "Shut. Up."  Then I got up and squealed a little and did a happy dance by myself.  So, I haven't spent any of the money yet and I'm not positive what I'm going to buy, but my kids are going to do art this year!  Many many thanks to my lovely mother and father. 

Not A Parody

Step 1: Watch this.

Step 2: Go back and finish watching it because chances are you didn't watch it all the way through the first time.  You really need to watch it all to fully appreciate the amount of winking and and sheer volume of 90s boy band costumes.

Step 3: Wonder how the mighty  have fallen this far.  Yes, Lance Bass is "overseeing" this group.

Step 4: Hope it's a parody and you've misunderstood.

Step 5: Realize it's not a parody.

Step 6: Go make sure your food storage is up to date because the world is about to end.

(Listen, I loved 90s boy bands.  I listened to many of them and that was my go to music.  I fell for the dreamy matching outfits each with a unique twist to fit that band member's personality.  It's true that they were cheesy, who cares.  It's true that some of them couldn't sing and sometimes the talent was minimal, that's ok.  This band is taking everything that was not so great about 90s boy bands, magnifying it times 20 [really? that hair?!] and sending it forth to YouTube.)

Bad Fans

I need to preface this post with a disclaimer saying that I have nothing against this gentleman.

(That's Riley Nelson with the long hair for those of you not on the up-and-up with BYU football players). 

I mean really, did you even read my last post about football?  Clearly I have nothing against him.  Also, in the game last night he ROCKED IT OUT.  We owe a lot of the credit for our last minute victory to Riley and his willingness to take a hit and ability to think on his feet.  He's a great quarterback.  Ok, disclaimer over.

People need to shut the hell up about Jake Heaps.  First of all, he's a tiny infant child (meaning, he's extremely young) and gets flustered.  We wish he wouldn't, but it happens.  I got distracted, I need to get back to the point.

Stop being crap fans.  Don't chant for Riley when Jake is in.  Honestly, do you think that improves his game play?   I'm sure your performance would improve if the people who are supposed to be on your side are cheering against you.  Also, never boo your own team (didn't happen at this game, but it did against UCF).  Every time the lousy fans decided it was a good idea to chant "Riley Riley" I was filled with rage.  If you're a good fan support your team NO MATTER WHAT.  Even though I think Heaps has it in him, do I cheer against Nelson?  No, I cheer for whoever the coaches decide to put in.  I feel so bad for Jake.  When you can get out there and do better then you are welcome to talk bad about him all you want.  

I know some of my friends and not just acquaintances are guilty of the Jake hate and especially of Riley worship (dear Provo, he's not the second-coming).  Perhaps this post offends you.  I don't care.  Perhaps you feel this is a direct attack on you.  It probably is.  It's not pointed at one particular person, but it is pointed.  

Rant over. 

Trashy People

It seems that the weekend is the only time I can find to blog so I am just on a blogging binge...what can I do, I have things to say.  I know I already ranted and I know it was lengthy, but I have another one.  This one, though, will be much shorter.  I promise think.  

Trashy people get on my nerves.  I know that in your mind you're thinking of scantily clad clubbers in pleather mini-skirts.  Definitely trashy, but definitely not what I'm talking about.  I mean people that leave trash around or don't throw trash away.  We're all guilty on occasion of piling the kitchen or bathroom trash a little too high so I would be a hypocrite for going on about that, but I try to generally be clean.  (I should note right now that this post has nothing to do with my roommates).  

On Friday morning at about 7:15 I got on the elevator in my building to head to work.  What greeted me (other than the arm chair that someone put there a couple of weeks ago)?  Two bags of kitchen garbage.  Seriously?  We have an elevator and you're so lazy you can't even take your garbage to the dumpster?  Nasty.

Our HOA is kind enough to to provide us with two garbage cans in the parking garage.  They're really useful when you have a fast food bag filled with gum wrappers from your car or need to toss out your junk mail.  Some people, though, abuse them, piling them high with Costco boxes and regular trash.  Approximate distance from trash can to actual dumpster?  Less than 20 steps.  I checked.  So, trashy folks, walk your big garbage over and threw it in so we can all utilize the little cans.  

Gee whiz, I'm bugged. 

Commuting

Right now I'm using the term commuting fairly loosely.  For real it takes me about twenty minutes to get to work.  I am fully aware that no one in this area has any idea what it's like for people like my dad to get to work.  He goes maybe thirty miles (I'm gonna bet on that being an overestimate) and it sometimes can take him three hours to get there.  Yeah, Provo traffic isn't the best, but you have NO IDEA.  Seriously, go to Stafford then complain about how long it takes you to get across town.  Thing is, in the greater DC area where people are commuting a lot they seem to understand some basic rules of the road.  Here I present some of my thoughts on driving.

1. Slower traffic keep right.  Um, hello Utah, why is this so hard?  If you're going less than 10 over get in the right lane.  I respect the fact that occasionally someone is going ten under in the right lane (let's be real, it's more than occasionally in these parts) and then you have to pass them in the left lane.  Then, GET OVER AND GET OUT OF MY WAY.

2. At least occasionally use the turn signal.  I think drivers in general are abysmal at fully utilizing their turn signal (which I don't understand at all because it's pretty much the easiest gesture in the history of the earth), but Utah drivers seem to have forgotten they have one.

3. You cannot cross a solid line of any color!  Seriously, in those construction zones where you have to stay in your lane, YOU HAVE TO STAY IN YOUR LANE!  Sometimes there are situations where you might have to cross because someone stops all of a sudden or whatever, but these are not times for casual passing.

4. If one more time I get stuck in the Utah road block (when cars in all lanes are going the same speed despite wide open road space in front of them thus preventing anyone from passing) I'm going to lose it.

5. What the heck is with the fact that all of I-15 is currently under construction at the same time and they do the work at prime hours of the day?  You're supposed to do that crap at night.

People in the area of Virginia where I learned to drive are sometimes scary drivers and I'm not going to deny that, but other drivers understand that and so choose their actions carefully.  For example, my dad was riding in a carpool with a stranger.  The driver in front of the vehicle my dad was in slammed on his brakes suddenly.  This pissed off the driver of my dad's car who had apparently had enough that day and so accelerated into the car in front (simply because he was mad).  Mad enough that he then reversed and slammed into the person behind him before putting the car back in drive and hitting the guy in front again.  All on purpose.

Don't get me wrong, I don't necessarily think this is the best practice and can be quite dangerous, but I can't help but wonder if this type of thing happened in Utah more often would people think before driving like total idiots?

Ok, rant over.

Let Me Introduce You

Let me introduce you to someone.  This is Riley Nelson. 

Oh yes, hello.  Could you please go back to this haircut?  Thanks.  

Riley is backup quarterback for BYU.  Tonight he rocked out a trick play that was BEAUTIFUL.  Not the point of this post.  Moving on. 

Looky, even though baby Jakey took his job they are nicey nice to each other (I have nothing against baby Jakey, by the way).  

Right now he's grown his hair out long.  I prefer it short, but it's growing at me.  He seems to keep it clean.  Still, not the point of the post.  

Want to hear a little known fact about good old Riley Nelson?  Let's talk about what Riley wears under his football pants.  Is it A) Underarmor shorts B) briefs C) athletic shorts D) nothing.

Did you choose an answer?  

If you chose D you are right!  Our seats being on the third row and all we see the team up close and personal and let me tell you, you can see RIGHT through those white pants and you can tell that Riley is all skin color under there. 

Also, you can see the whatever the leg strap parts are called on his jock strap.  That part's not my favorite. 

Is it bad that I don't mind my view much?  In fact, I really like it.  At the Utah game the most interesting thing on the field was Riley Nelson's backside.  

Men look good in football pants.  Riley looks especially good in football pants.  Riley apparently has something against underclothing.  

I'll stop there.  I promised Sarah I would try to keep this post relatively tame because her mom reads my blog.  

P.S. New football love?  Daniel Sorensen.  Yum.  

Another Freaky Dream: Voldemort Edition

I've told you before that I have strange dreams and they come in cycles and are super bizarre.  This is another one.  It's kind of disgusting so if you're feeling exceedingly sensitive or nauseous, don't read.

Ok, so it was decided that I had to fight Voldemort.  My own pals in real life were there supporting me as were Harry, Ron, and Hermione.  I was getting all prepped, but was not magical.  At my disposal I had a few magical items.  It was almost a ring fight type of situation with everyone watching and keeping their hands off.  I started by just attacking him physically.  It wasn't really working so I moved on to something else.  Then my dream kind of fast forwarded like I wasn't paying attention to a movie and all of a sudden I was winning (how the heck I was beating Voldemort without being magical is beyond me).

I had him down and injured (injured bad), but he was regenerating quickly.  His wounds would just heal themselves if given any amount of time.  I was getting tired and I knew I couldn't go much longer.  Then I found something awesome in my bag: some aerosol hairspray with some sort of essence of phoenix in it.  I started spraying old Voldy and he started rotting away like that guy in The Last Crusade.  He was basically a skeleton with sticky brown and yellow and black goo attached to his bones at this time (and he was still talking to me and taunting).  The magic phoenix hairspray prevented him from regenerating as quickly as he was, but given time without being killed he would still continue to rebuild and take over again.  I wasn't sure what to do.

Suddenly I realized the solution: I had to destroy his heart (it was somehow still stuck in his rib cage chest, though it was a little shrunken).  The problem was, I ran out of phoenix hairspray.  With no better options in sight I grabbed a knife and started to cut the heart apart.  The pieces just rejoined or continued beating separately.  Voldemort was still taunting me.  How the heck to destroy the heart and Voldemort?  I was out out of ideas and time was running out as the rest of his body continued its slow regrowth.

If you're thinking of the solution already, then you're gross and I want to know how you got there.  In my dream it just came to me.  The only way to destroy the heart once and for all was... to eat it.  So, I quickly cut the heart into the smallest pieces possible and mashed it together into a form similar to a hot dog.  Then, I ate it.  One: it was disgusting.  Two: even if it wasn't, knowing you have Voldemort's heart in your stomach will make you nauseous.  I finished off the Voldy-heart hot dog and that was the end.  At the end of my dream just before I woke up I remember being uneasy and wondering if when it passed through my digestive track if it would begin to join together again or if it would happen while still inside.  My friends (and my character friends) assured me it was ok and before the outcome could be ascertained positively, I woke up.  Did I want to eat breakfast when I woke up?

Not at all.

The end.

A Great Video

Listen, just go watch this now because it's so funny at the end in my opinion.  I giggled out loud to myself.

DI: Always an Adventure?

Once upon a time I was desperately searching all places with used junk for Candy Land (perhaps a rant on how the new one is crap later).  On one particular day I hit up the Provo DI and was almost run over by a guy in a motorized wheel chair.  Later I was at the DI in American Fork and saw the same old guy sitting on a couch.  I said hello and acknowledged the fact that we'd both been at two DIs that day.  He asked what I was hunting so furiously for and why.  I told him I was a teacher and needed some stuff for my classroom.  We wished each other luck and I headed on my way.  When I finished my hunt (and didn't find anything I wanted) I passed him as I headed on my way.  The man asked me to sit as he told me about some old movie star that had a show on tv when he was a kid and how beautiful she was.

Before too long the man asked me if I believed in God and the Gospel and the priesthood.  I figured he was trying to be very much like my grandfather and just making sure I was doing what I should.  Old people sometimes get a little nosy with strangers (not all old people, just some).  I answered in the affirmative and he said I was a "dangerous woman."  He went on to talk to me a little bit about religion.  Nothing struck me as particularly odd until another man came up to him and asked him about Warren Jeffs.  The stranger talking to me said Warren Jeffs was way out of line and quoted some people on the matter.  Then the second guy said, "Ok, I just wanted to ask because I knew your group would have something to say about that."  Wait, what?  This guy has a group?  Oh dear....

Long story shortened a little bit this guy threw a whole lot of backwards doctrine at me and told me how polygamy (or celestial plural marriage, as he insisted on calling it) was the only way to live.  Little did he know that polygamy is one of my major questioning points of the church and something that I'm insanely uncomfortable with.  When he quoted Journal of Discourses to me I was quick to point out that Brigham Young sometimes erred on the side of insane which led to him going on a racist diatribe about another error with the mainstream church.

He eventually invited me to his sacrament meeting to get some real answers and gave me his cell phone number.  I was told to call him any time day or night.  Last week I went to check DI for Candy Land again and he was lowering the wheel chair lift to one of those old people shuttle bus things to leave.  I was pretty sure he saw me and I hurried inside and got on the phone with my mom so I could pretend to be busy if he approached me.  The man didn't follow me, but I did get the willies and was on super freaked out.  One thing I have decided: if I run into this guy again I'll have to stand my ground and be a little more honest and a little less polite.  I may not be sure of many things, but I definitely don't want to be a polygamist.

Oh, and one note.  The guy told me not to tell anyone what he told me because then my friends would start to reject me.  You're not going to reject me, are you?

Definitely a Shame Spiral

About a week and a half ago I was in the midst of a shame spiral, as my friend Brittany terms it.  I'd had a bad day at work.  I was still struggling to adapt to my apartment.  I was flat broke, but luckily I'd found 40 bucks in a bank account I rarely used.  I went to the grocery store in a shirt that looked two sizes too big (it was actually only once size too big) and gym shorts.  My hair was a hot mess and I was in quite a bad mood.  I had necessities to buy and wasn't really in the mood to be there.  I got my necessities and a couple of groceries and also placed some raw chocolate chip cookie dough into my basket with no intentions of baking it.  You know what eating raw cookie dough makes you feel like?  Simultaneously you feel like it was the best idea ever and you hate yourself.  It was one of those days, you know?  I was walking through the parking lot back to my car with my phone tucked into my bra and it started ringing.  Seriously?  The one time my hands are full my phone is going to ring?  I was pissed, saw it wasn't a number I recognized, but decided to answer it anyway.  It was a principal from an interview I'd gone to earlier that day.  "Great," I thought.  I just interviewed today and they're already telling me they picked someone else.

Not so.  I GOT THE JOB!  Hello, this is only my lifelong dream to be a teacher.  Now I've got one week under my belt teaching fifth grade and it's awesome.  After the first day I almost cried because it was a disaster, but it's gotten much better.  I really think I'm good at this job.  I'm still adapting to the learning curve, but it's not as bad as I expected it to be.  The kids are great (even though I have a few difficult ones) and I really enjoy this job.  That's what picking a career is all about, yeah?

Change is Hard

Warning: this post might be a little bit whiny and I'm sorry for that.  Also I think the word whiny looks whiny.  

I just moved.  I'd been living in one apartment for three years and decided it was time for a private bedroom so I moved a couple of blocks away.  The way I'm handling it you'd think I moved to China.  It started the night before last when I spent my first night here.  The bed is not comfortable.  Now, my bed before was no great awesome thing, but I was used to it and now this bed is weird.  I woke up at least four times during the night not sure where I was or why I was there.  The same thing happened when I woke up in the morning.  The wall is on a different side than in my previous apartment and it's just hard. 

Today I was out with Steph and I was being very mediocre company.  I got home and napped on my couch then went shopping with Donna.  Let me just say, my whole life feels confusing right now.  I would go the wrong direction in a town I've been in for three years.  The grocery store was supremely disorienting (it was Macey's, not some new store).  It got to the point I was so frustrated that I was either going to murder the people in the self-checkout line or just leave my groceries.  Seriously, if you have approximately 498,004 coupons do not go to the self-checkout stand especially at the busiest time of the day.  Not to mention the cashier was totally inept.  I feel really mad at Macey's.  

Those of you, my dear blog-y friends, that know me in real life or pay attention to this block know that change is hard for me.  I knew it was going to take getting used to this new apartment and that I would miss my old place, but I just didn't expect this.  By the way, my new place is super nice and I really like it, I just can't handle the change.

Priorities

Fact: I have some pretty awesome friends.  These friends have their priorities sorted out just right most of the time.

Examples-

- Sarah's rant about skinny jeans (and the blessed return of flares) on her blog.  I pretty much want to copy paste the whole thing here because she said everything right on.

- Brittany said I can be BFF with Tim Gunn and she's ok with that.

- Lastly, the one that inspired this post.  I was talking about how stressed I would be if I got a teaching job with less than a week until school starts.  Niccole's first question, "Is this going to affect my football season?  I mean, like, you'll be stressed and stuff."  Then she tried to cover up that her concern over the massive amounts of stress would be the functionality of our football seating group and attendance.  Little did she know that things like that are exactly why I like her.

On a totally unrelated note, I keep thinking of things to blog, but they're frequently Harry Potter related and I'm trying not to overwhelm you.

Watch This Now

Sarah posted this on my facebook wall.  It's amazing.  Watch it this moment (especially you Brittany), but warning: NSFW as the song "Forget You" by Cee-Lo is used and it's not the edited forget you version.  I love this so much.

Why I Should Never Go Home

I'm a momma's girl.  If you know me at all then this is no surprise to you.  I talk to my mother once a day at least and one time we were in a fight and I didn't call her for a week and I almost died.  My most favorite reason to go home is to see my momma.  I love the rest of my family too, but none so much as my momma.  We love to go shopping together and talk and watch dumb tv and everything.  It's great.  We have a grand old time.  Then the problem comes.  I've gone home and gotten all reattached to her and then all of a sudden I have to fly back across the country and I don't get to see her at all and I don't get any attention and it's hard.  It makes me sad and homesick.  HELLO, I AM AN ADULT! I HAVE A REAL JOB AND SOON WILL BE PAYING ALL MY OWN BILLS AND I GET HOMESICK FOR MY MOM.  This is really kind of embarrassing and unacceptable, but I don't know how to fix it except for just not go home or something which is just not an option.

My Family (again)

I now present to you almost word for word a conversation I had with my sister Heather on the phone this morning.

Me: Hello?
Heather: Come to my house and marry this boy!
Me: Um...what? What boy?
Heather: I just got a new neighbor and Sister Cannon, her brother came to visit and he's in the backyard fixing our air conditioner. Come and marry him quick before he leaves!
Me: Uh...no.
Heather: Come on.  Just come over here quick and bring a pie.
Me: I'm not going to do that.
Heather: Fine. Just don't say I never tried.
Me: I'll never say that.
Heather: Are you sure you won't come and marry him?
Me: I'm sure.
Heather: Fine, bye.

That was it.  That was the whole conversation.

Pottermore

Yes, it's after 4am here. Who cares because check it.

Why Bellatrix Scares Me

Before I talk about Bellatrix let me tell you something about Ginny.  Why doesn't she get a bigger part in the movies?  She's such a BAMF in the books.

Oh, and a follow-up to yesterday's horcrux post.  Why does it seem like everyone in the movies knows about horcruxes?  Hermione is in the vault and she's like "Accio horcrux" and Griphook doesn't even bat an eye.  Neither does Aberforth when they're mentioned.  I was under the impression that they were relatively unknown.  Also, who else out there has horcruxes?

Now to Bellatrix.  She's terrifying.  To me, she's scarier by far than Voldemort.

Like when she tortures Hermione because she's so awful.  Not to mention this turns my stomach every freaking time I see it.

And please stop looking at Hermione like she is your dinner.

So, why is she so scary to me and by far worse than Voldemort who is the most evil of all evilness?  It's because she's so unhinged.  Voldemort seems mostly in control of himself most of the time.  Sure, he's doing awful things and is crazy, but it's not an unplanned unpredictable crazy.  Bellatrix, on the other hand, seems capable of anything at anytime.  You have no idea what she might do and when except that whatever she does is going to be evil.  Also add to that that Helena Bonham Carter does an absolutely amazingly terrifying job acting the part.  Remember in Prisoner of Azkaban when she licks her dark mark?

Yeah, ew.  Scary.  All we can know for sure about Bellatrix is that she's absolutely evil, she's completely devoted to Voldemort, and Molly Weasley totally kicks her trash.

Goodbye, Bellatrix, until the next time you haunt my dreams.

On Horcruxes

Listen, I know it's not ok for me to blog only about Harry Potter, but I can't help it.  I saw the movie again tonight and I want to talk about it a little more.  So far of the three times I've seen it the first was the best, the second was good, and the third was almost as good as the first.

Completely unrelated sidenote: is that comma I used before "and the third" what is known as the Oxford comma and according to the Oxford style bible or whatever the heck it is isn't even supposed to be used anymore? I'm not a grammar/usage person so I don't really know.

Back to Harry Potter.  Most of this is about Horcruxes but I do want to say to unrelated things.  One is that Cho Chang finally learned how not to be such an obnoxious uptalker (in the other movies EVERY sentence she said sounded like a question).  Also, I'm in love with the tiny Slytherin boy in the great hall scene.

Now, about horcruxes.  I just want the destruction of all of them to be more dramatic like the locket.  Did I say this already? I think maybe I did so I guess I'll shut up.  It just seemed like they were all easy apart from the locket.  I read or heard this next thing somewhere and would love to hear your thoughts.  Basilisk fangs/venom can destroy horcruxes.  Why, then, did Harry not get destroyed in the chamber when he was bitten?  Ok, sorry. I'm way too into this.  Tell me to stop.

Oh by the way if you have a Muvico theater near you go to the 21 and up movie.  Leather chairs, food delivered to your seat, super comfortable and amazing.  Also, you should get some amazing family members like mine (I'm talking Mom and Laurel taking me on a Harry Potter date tonight).  Also, inappropriate confession (second of the week, yes?) why does Harry look best in the inappropriate fan art of him and Draco together?  I don't like the art because it's weird and that's so not what happened or would happen but Harry looks freaking great (see the pictures Conan showed Tom Felton when he was on the show the other day if you want to know what I'm talking about.  I'm not putting it here).

Because I don't have any good pictures to put here because I'm a bad blogger, please go here and enjoy all these moment appropriate gifs.  As Stefanie said, "Somebody on the internet totally gets me."

Note: I need to make clear that Sarah linked me originally to that site with all the gifs.  Props to her for always finding great Harry Potter things and making me consider joining Pinterest because all her Harry Potter pins make me cry and I definitely can't have another internet thing to do and obsess over and even the titles of Brittany's boards that she mentioned in her blog make me want to go there. (Oh my gosh most disjointed run-on sentence ever). 

Other HP and the DH pt 2 Thoughts

The title explains the purpose of this post.

- As Brittany pointed out I forgot to mention the awkward Voldemort/Draco hug.

- Why didn't the treasure in Bellatrix's vault burn them as it multiplied?

- I loved that the filmmakers chose to show the sword disappearing from Griphook's dead hand.

- Freaking a the dragon scene was awesome, thank you.

- Why does Daniel Radcliffe almost always have a mullet as Harry Potter but decently attractive hair other times?  This bothers me.  Also, WHY IS HE SO PALE?

- Ginny Weasley is gorgeous and I don't care what you say, but you are not Hermione.  I sometimes get bothered by people who dress up as Hermione because I'm so her in my mind that I get protective.

- I love when Aberforth comes out and does his patronus and totally owns a ton of dementors.

- Why are patronuses (patroni?) not animals for the most part in these movies? (sidenote: expecto patronads)

I'm going to see the movie again tomorrow. Take three. (I didn't get to go and have amorentia because of scheduling conflicts - sad).

Inappropriate

This kid is four years younger than me AND acts in a moderately dumb tv show.  This attraction is inappropriate. 

Also, this picture is mediocre. 

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2

I guess it's time to face the music and blog about the movie.  I really was trying to avoid it, but Niccole specifically requested (via comment on Sarah's blog) my opinions and who am I to turn down a chance to voice my opinion?  You can call me a copycat if you want, but I'm going to go short bullet point style because it's easiest and I can jump around as thoughts come to me.

- I haven't sobbed yet.  I feel sad but the first time I was too hyped up on caffeine and the second time I was trying to get over throwing up a cheese dog.  TMI? Yes, I think so.  I feel sad and I feel the Harry shaped hole in my life, but I have yet to cry my eyes out during the movie (though I did tear up repeatedly both times).

-Not helpful: my dad comparing my sadness to his as a kid when the took Roadrunner off the air.  Thanks for minimizing my pain, dad.

- Only slightly related: Hopefully I'm going to Alamo Drafthouse with my sister when I go home to see the movie and eat the Harry Potter themed food including Amorentia.  I'll update you.

- The beginning was perfect.  I loved how there weren't logos or sound effects it just went straight from trailer into Harry Potter.

- Oh my gosh all action all the time! I was afraid of falling asleep during the movie the first time (because really, movies make me sleepy) but I needn't have worried because you'd have to be dead to sleep.  I suppose it's time to get specific.

- First thing that bothered me: Why didn't Harry fix his wand?  Is he just all of a sudden ok with having Draco's wand?  I think not.  Dear Harry, fix the stupid pheonix and holly wand so you can be Harry Potter.

- I thought Daniel Radcliffe rocked the epilogue.  The others did well, but he rocked it.

- One friend blogged that the way Naigini attacked Snape repeatedly was too graphic and violent, I thought it was appropriately so.

- I could have done with more verbal spells.  I wanted Harry to have that final expelliarmus.  I also wanted Harry to get to explain to Voldemort why and how he was wrong and why his plan failed and to rub in his humanity by calling him Tom.  Also, I wasn't a fan of the blowing away in the wind of Voldemort as he died.  It made me think of the dust storm Quirrel/Voldemort for Sorcerer's Stone in which case he wasn't really dead.

- I've never been a huge Snape fan, but this movie made me a believer out of me.  I still think he's mostly evil and self-interested, but the movie redeemed him a little.

- Why in the world did his memories come out of his tears?  Weird.  Also, the pensieve was all strange this time.

- I know I'm coming across ultra-critical right now, but I LOVED this movie.  I'm ready to see it for the third time.  One thing I loved: Harry hiding among the students in the Great Hall then confronting Snape.  I thought it was very stunning.

- The twins crying and having their moment on the roof is so tender to me, but why didn't we address Fred being dead a little more directly?

- Where did Blaise Zabini disappear to?

- Also, what happened to the Hallows story line?  If you read the book you know Harry's cloak is THE invisibility cloak, but that wasn't addressed.  In fact, the whole uniting the Hallows plot didn't even exist.

- Ditto Dumbledore's past.  I was wondering if they would make it seem like he loved Gridewald (which didn't come across in the book).

- Why does my dad (and apparently other people) think they wanted the audience to believe that Snape was Harry's dad?  How dare you sully the name of Lilly Potter that way.

- Going into the forest scene?  Oh my gosh I was going to die.  All the people he loved were there and his momma and his dad and it was so precious.  I wish he had hugged Ron before he left.

- Thank you movie makers for giving us a look into the Chamber of Secrets for horcrux destruction.

- My friend Sam is a hater and blogged about it.  It's depressing.  He basically called out everybody having a sad heart over the end of their childhood and dresser-uppers and said JKR isn't that great of a writer.  Rant over on that.

- I loved the Snape flashbacks, but I wanted a little more.  I think I want a lot because I'm such a fan of the books.

- Like Sarah, Hermione as Bellatrix was amazingly done.  Helena Bonham Carter is pure genius and so scary.

- McGonagall is such a BAMF.  She was funny and also amazing and hardcore.  Loved when she called the statues to protect Hogwarts.  Also loved Seamus.

- I don't know what else to say right now.  I have an opinion on pretty much every part so if you have a specific question please ask.

Sidenote: most overused costumes are Luna and Trelawney.

P.S. This is my 199th post.  I didn't do anything for 100, what should I do for 200?

It's That Important

I need to explain to you what Harry Potter means to me and why it's so important.  Because it is.  You can say that to you Harry is just a character in a book, but I grew up with Harry and I love Harry.  For a pretty good summation of my feelings about the end of it all, read this article.

When I was in fifth grade all the posters for the book fair at school had the cover of Sorcerer's Stone on them.  I thought it was all stupid.  A few of my friends told me to read the books and I pretty openly mocked the idea.  What could be so great about a kid who finds out he's a wizard then goes to magic school?  Dumb.  A few weeks (maybe months?) later I finally decided to read the books.  Our small school library only had one copy of each of the [then three] books and there weren't any copies of the first, so I started with Chamber of Secrets and loved it.  Within the week I was reading Prisoner of Azkaban and finally Sorcerer's Stone.  After I finished, I started them again.  In those early days number two was my favorite because it terrified the living daylights out of me.  I read them all repeatedly, but that one over and over again.

My mom worked at Wal-Mart when the fourth one was coming out.  She brought me some of the buttons that they wore to promote the release of Goblet of Fire.  I could hardly stand it when she would come home and tell me stories of walking past the readied display case of books.  Over and over I begged her to steal me one.  Before long my first experience with a midnight release arrived.  Perhaps it was just our small Wal-Mart, but there really was just one display case of books, nothing compared to the precariously stacked pallets that came later.  I remember being livid as an older lady stepped in front of me to take the first book.

And thus my obsession continued.  The first movie was the first movie I ever bought tickets for in advance.  I dressed up as Hermione as often as possible.  When I was a senior in high school (or I guess the summer just after) and the last book came out I got up at five am to stand in line to get a wristband to stand in line.  We were back at Border's by noon.  Luckily when I came to college I was able to find friends that also loved Harry Potter.  My very first roommate (Sarah) was just as obsessed as I was.

No joke when I was a kid I used to pray that I wouldn't die before the final book was released because I had to know how the story ended.  After I finished book seven I figured I could die anytime.  I am not exaggerating.  This actually happened.

And so tonight, it all ends.  The last movie is released and, as many have said, an era ends.  I grew up with Harry.  I am a part of the Harry Potter generation.  It's been a part of me for so long.  I choose to end with a quote from JK Rowling herself.  She summed up what we all needed when she said, "Hogwarts will always be there to welcome you home."

You are probably aware of how I usually like to include pictures in my posts, but this is too personal.  I don't want to just throw in pictures willy-nilly.  I want what this means to stand for itself. 

Recap

I'm going to get in line at around noon tomorrow for Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2, but in case you missed some of the others or need a refresher course I thought I'd post this.  

I think it's quite well done and the guys are hilarious and really keep all the important stuff in there content wise.  Also, as I stated on facebook, this is one of the few Harry Potter related things not making me cry these days. 

Soapy Woes

Do you know what I hate? That little dried bit of soap that gets stuck in the end of the pump and is disgusting and hard and dry.  Why does that happen?  Why hasn't someone designed something to fix this huge nasty issue?  Ditto to lotion with a pump. I'm grossed out just thinking about it.

Food Delivery

I camped out for the Fourth of July parade all night Sunday night and realized that I live in a crazy place and didn't get a wink of sleep and also got to go to Stadium of Fire and see David Archuleta and Brad Paisley and other awesome things.  Perhaps I'll blog about it more later, but probably not. 

Last night Destiny and I ordered Chinese food for dinner.  It was from Saigon.  If you live in Provo or know Saigon you will not be surprised when you hear this story.  Ok so I figured it would be the same delivery guy it always is (the surly waiter guy).  Imagine my shock when an hour later a bearded white guy shows up at my doorstep.

"Did you order Chinese food?" 

"Um...yeah."

"Oh, well I don't work at the restaurant I was just there eating and they were busy so they asked me to deliver for them, but I know the owners."

"Oh ok, do you have a pen so I can sign this?"

Hello, is this weird and awkward or what?  If this was any other restaurant I would be surprised, but not from Saigon.  That whole place is bizarre and awesome in its unique way.  

Night-time Reading

I'm a creep.  This is kind of well known so I won't bother to elaborate.  I was recently linked to a friend's blog.  I have this thing about reading a blog I haven't before.  I can't just start from where I jump in and continue.  There's some compulsion inside of me to start at the beginning and at least browse the whole life of the blog.  So, if a blog has been around for a long time I probably won't start reading it.

Tonight I was sitting around with some time on my hands and decided to start reading this friend's blog so that I could stay current with it.  I often get impatient with this process of mine.  I get bored and hope for the end to come and to run out of posts (but I still have to do it - I hate myself sometimes).  That wasn't the case with this post.  This guy is a writer.  Big deal, I have other friends who are writers and their blogs are just as average as any other (or maybe slightly above, but I try to stick to reading pretty good blogs).  But man, this was good stuff.  The posts weren't even topics that particularly enthralled me, but I read every single word - no browsing for me tonight.

Many of the blogs I read are funny.  I have hilarious friends that write hysterical blogs and I love to read them, but they're not the same as this blog.  The writer comes through.  I especially love when he calls attention to himself and the fact that he's writing.  Mostly the point of this post is to praise that blog, though I won't link him to this post because that's kind of weird, yeah?  Would you find it strange if all of a sudden one of your friends started reading your blog then posted a whole post about how interesting/good it is?

P.S. I feel the way about poetry and art.  Just let me enjoy without too much analyzing and be free to feel without knowing exactly why or what.

My life isn't exciting enough for a single topic post.

I'm just creepy enough to love the new "coment view" of albums on facebook.

Good friends might bring you a gift when they go out of town.  Great friends bring you rocks.

Playing mom is hard and exhausting.  No matter how smart the seven year old is, there's no way to seamlessly insert one into a singles life.

I'm addicted to the Provo Farmer's market even though they have almost exactly the same thing every week.

Pottermore was announced and I'm stoked and confused and excited, but we have one problem.  When you sign up you have to register a magical username and I only have a few months to come up with one that is adequately awesome without being too cheesy.  

Seven Peaks = yes.  Destiny and I have been there three times in the past week.  The new slide is epic.  the funky feces smell by the slide tower is not.  

I'm ready for Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows part 2 and to take another trip to Orlando.  For someone that hates Florida as much as I do I sure loved Orlando and felt at home there. 

I love summertime.  Humidity can stay away from me forever and that's fine.  It's also ok with me if the 92 degree day we had this week is the only one of the summer.  I love mild summer.

June 23rd

Three reasons June 23rd will be the best day in a long time:

• I'm going to the Kid History episode five premiere with some awesome people.
• Jimmer and the NBA draft.
• POTTERMORE announcement (I love the way the horned owls twitch).

The end. Sorry for the boringness of my blog lately. 

Butter

That's right.  You read the title of this post correctly.  I said butter.  Here's the thing.  What do you call the amount of butter pictured here?

Me? I would call it 8 tablespoons of butter, half a cup of butter, or a stick of butter.  Never in my whole life did I think anything of this until a little over a year ago when someone referred to it as a cube of butter.  Um, what?  Since the I've heard it all over the place.  Is this regional?  How does that butter look even remotely like a cube?  Let's get really specific and just call it a rectangular prism of butter.  I really don't have a problem with this, it just makes me curious.  So, what say you?  Cube of butter?  Stick of butter?  Four ounces of butter?

Dying and Crying

This is making me die and cry and be sad and get goosebumps.  Enjoy.

Punctuation-o

Normally I like the English language.  I'm no fanatic or anything, but I don't care that much that it's supposedly one of the hardest to learn because I learned it ok.  By now you probably know that if I start off by telling you how I like something I'm going to move on to complain about it in some way or another.

Really it's question marks that bother me.  In Spanish (disclaimer: my knowledge of Spanish grammar comes from EXTREMELY limited experience) you can put your question marks just around your question within a larger sentence.  In English YOU CANNOT DO THIS and it makes me frustrated and confused when I try to compose a sentence that isn't a question but contains a question.  And because this is how my life works I cannot currently think of a sentence like this.

Unrelated: Do you ever run into the problem of typing question marks instead of exclamation points and vice versa while texting?  I don't have this problem in any other medium.  Biggest offending statement? "Guess what?" Let's be real, guess what is not a question.

That is all.

MTV Movie Awards

I was going to write a long ranty post about the MTV Movie Awards, but the whole idea was exhausting. I'll just say three things.

1) Apparently children are the only ones that know how to give appropriate acceptance speeches.

2) Don't be high at awards shows because it seems to scream "I'm a deplorable human being!"

3) Potty and sex humor for cheap laughs get on my nerves.

Man, even that was tiring.

Desserts

I got asked to make dessert for break the fast as well as host mix and mingle this week.  You know what that means: making about a thousand jillion desserts.  For mix and mingle I picked an ice cream dessert since it's supposed to be pretty hot today.

Firstly, I made a graham cracker crust (I doubled this recipe which was plenty for two 9x13 pans).  Let me tell you, this is DELICIOUS crust.  I just want to eat it with nothing on top.  

While you're making the crust, set out some ice cream and frozen juice.  I was making two pans.  One raspberry lemonade flavor (with vanilla ice cream, obviously), and one good chocolate based one (no juice in that one).  You really can use whatever combinations you want, but even though I love chocolate, I like the flavor and texture the juice ones have.

Nextly, once your ice cream and juice are pretty thawed, dump them in a big bowl and mix thoroughly.  I'm not patient enough to let them melt thoroughly or I don't have the appropriate tools or something so I used occasional microwaving to help the process.

Since it's spring I added a little food coloring to make the pink brighter because the color is extremely faint.  Full disclosure: I also added a little squirt of lemon juice to up the acidity.  Really you can do what you like.  

Spread the ice cream mixture over the graham cracker crust nice and smooth.  Realize you forgot to take a picture of stirring the chocolate ice cream so that it's soft and spreadable AND a picture of it in the pan.  

After the dessert is frozen solidly again spread some thawed Cool Whip on top (or in my case, be impatient again, thus ensuring the ugliness of your dessert).  If you want to you can drizzle some caramel and chocolate syrup over the chocolate one and some raspberry sauce on the lemonade one.  Store in the freezer.  Dip the bottom of the pan in warm water for 30 seconds before serving to make it easier.

I'm not into food photography at all.   That being said, I wish the light in my kitchen actually showed color....

It occurred to me yesterday that despite my love of cooking and watching Food Network, Top Chef, and the like, I'll never make beautiful food.  I don't know if it's because I'm impatient or because I lack an artists eye, but I am unable to create something gorgeous.

Other things I made yesterday:

Homemade oreos (which are often pretty disgusting, but not these) in case there's not enough snacks for mix and mingle.

Rice krispy treats for break the fast (yes, that's chocolate on the bottom and yes, I'm five and covered the top with rainbow sprinkles).  

This is weird and uncomfortable...

I don't know how I feel about these two guys looking so much alike...
(do I get bonus points for using an ellipsis in the title and in the only text of the post?)

Religious Question

I was reading The Actor and the Housewife by Shannon Hale (review) and came to a quote that sums up well something I've thought in the past.

"Why would calling on the Lord's name ever be in vain if he were really there to listen?"

Don't get me wrong, I do not and will not take the Lord's name in vain, but I have questioned this before.  Occasionally in the past I've said "Oh praise the Lord Jesus," but really am extremely grateful (for some reason that word is hard for me to spell) for the situation.  This is a real question.  Please let me know your thoughts. 

P.S. Cooking blog coming soon.  

Restaurant Review: Roll Up Crepes

Today I hit up Roll Up Crepes on State Street in Orem.  I'd passed by a few times and been intrigued, so I figured I'd give it a try.  I ordered the ham and cheese crepe (full disclosure: I secretly like bizarre and crappy ham and cheese things like Hot Pockets).  It cost about six bucks and came with a side of tomato basil soup.

First, the soup.  It was good, but it wasn't soup.  It was thicker than marinara sauce, more along the lines of a tomato-y dip.  The crepe was ok, but I would have rather had a Hot Pocket and that would have been a lot cheaper.  Perhaps I should have tried the special of the day (pulled pork crepe), but I already admitted my strange taste preferences.  The portion size was large (think of a big burrito).  The staff was friendly and I found the strange fake tree in the middle of the restaurant bizarrely appealing, but the place was DEAD empty.  I predict that it really won't last long (the location is a little weird and inconvenient and I've seen at least three restaurants through there already).  That being said, I'll probably go back and try a dessert crepe and perhaps even give one more try to a savory crepe before I make my final judgement.

Rumination

I just want to warn you that this blog post is not as lighthearted as most of the others I've written lately.  I also want to warn you that the chances of me looking like garbage in pictures included in this post are high.

For the past couple of days I've been thinking about growing up and how my life is changing.  There are heaps of benefits to growing up.  In fact, I posted a facebook status expressing my gratitude not to be in high school anymore.  Don't get me wrong, there were some good things in high school.  I had some decent friend groups even though I often acted ridiculous in more ways than one (not all of them friendly or harmless).  There were some great teachers that influenced me, and I did some growing up.

Now I've graduated from college and I'm certified to teach children (though being able to find a teaching job is another story all together).  All of this is a little bit of me rambling to avoid the point.  Sometimes I wish I could go back to some of my previous ways of thinking.

Thinking that brought me here on my own money and choice.

(No, I don't hold any delusions that EFY works miracles or is the only productive place for youth to be in the summer.)

There was easier thinking that led to taking pictures like this for a very specific purpose (a purpose I'm not sure I fully or possibly even partially agree with anymore).

Something like this was fun, not lame and possibly mortifying.  Not to mention I had no trouble admitting it.  

I went here as often as I could manage it.  

And I sincerely loved doing the fun, serious and silly here.  It was one of the things I most looked forward to every year (despite the sweltering heat and obnoxious humidity and inevitable drama).  

All of that is a way for me to say that I lost something that I can't get back.  The person in the pictures up there cried on vacation one time because she accidentally said damn (I realize this is outrageous and isn't something I particularly want to go back to).  I wasn't perfect and neither was my life.  In a lot of ways my life was really crappy then, but something's missing now and I wish it wasn't.  Thing is, I think I've perhaps gone past a point where I can return to the one thing that seemed to be functional during that time of my life.  It's not a matter of choosing it.  That would be too easy.  I think after a certain level of exposure and thinking in a different way, there's no way back.  

I know that I'm rambling in an insane way.  Let me sum it all up: I lost something and I miss it and I wish I could have it back and in a way I think that's just the nature of childhood and parts of childhood and as much as a person can miss and even crave the comforts of that time, you can't return.  Can you?  Not to mention I've begun to resent and even hate the things that in my view ruined a degree of my innocence.  

Did any of that even make any sense at all?

Oops! All Berries

I was at Wal*Mart the other day and I saw that Quaker has brought back this childhood memory (always for a limited time, just like the McRib - except way tastier, but most likely with an equivalent amount of sugar).  I didn't buy any (mostly because I'm cheap, but partially because I have three boxes of cereal in my cupboard already).

This morning while eating my breakfast I started thinking about Oops! All Berries once again.  Suddenly, I was smacked with a stroke of genius.  What if I bought a box of Oops! All Berries and combined it with this?

What a genius and delicious cereal I could make by combining these two!

I now give you the liberty to look away from this blog as you either face palm or place something padded in front of you to minimize the danger of the slightly more dramatic head desk.  

We all have our moments, right?

Trees

It amuses me when people from the desert/western mountainous states go east or to other places with trees for the first time.  Some of them talk about how claustrophobic it makes them to be on the interstate and not be able to see what's around (picture of I-95 in Virginia).

More often mentioned is the confusion and frustration of buildings obscured partially or completely by trees.  Thing is, when it's more wet and the soil is nice and rich (meaning not the sand of the desert), the trees thrive.  

For example, here's a Google Map shot of my neighborhood at home.  Yep, those are all trees.  And even in those patches of trees the houses are about as regular as the ones you can see that are more exposed.  

(Seriously, click on it.  There're a bajillion trees.)

I definitely miss the trees when I'm out here.  Also, I want to be clear that I'm not mocking the people that are shocked by the trees and greenness the first time they encounter such a thing.  When I first came to Utah the enormous mountains shocked me and I still love to just look at them.  The sparse dessert on the way to the sand dunes on a camping trip enthralled me.  I'm just amused by the fascination with something I grew up with. 

Having the trees makes for some nice shade in the summer, though.  However, in the East where it's obnoxiously humid all the time (when I talked to my mother yesterday it was 98% humidity, it's 63% right now), the shade doesn't actually do that much.  It's still hot and outrageously sticky in the shade.  The only real benefit of the shade is to get the sun out of your face. 

Oh, and a benefit to the humidity that I love to complain about?  Big thunderstorms and heat lightning.  Come back to me beautiful summer weather. 

Also, for your viewing pleasure, a beauty shot from Skyline Drive (near my home town of Luray, part of the Shenandoah National Park).

Hypocrites

Today in Sunday School we talked about hypocrites.  That's right, despite the fact that I look like I'm paying absolutely no attention and I'm playing Word Warp (which is like Text Twist) on my phone, I'm listening.  The teacher (Erin?) asked us what we thought of when we considered hypocrites.  I didn't contribute, but there is something I thought then and was shown to be applicable later that evening.  To me not being a hypocrite often means not being someone different at church than you are in life.

You know what, I'm going to be me no matter what.  Just because it's Sunday I'm not going to start putting on airs.  If there's a movie that I'd watch any other day of the week and I'm a person who watches movies on Sunday (I understand that some people choose not to watch movies or tv on Sunday as a way of keeping the Sabbath day holy and I completely respect that choice) my movie choice isn't going to be different.  I'm the same person on Sunday as any other day of the week and I'm not going to put on a show.

Example.  Tonight at mix and mingle (alternately called snack and mack or grab a cookie take a lookie) Sam started talking about the movie Sixteen Candles.  I've never seen it, but I have a copy on VHS so I figured I'd watch it.  I expressed the same and someone in the ward stated rather huffily, "Well, that's a great movie to watch on a Sunday." Get over it girl.  Sunday doesn't make me pretend to be someone I'm not.

Pet Peeve

I have a pet peeve. You're probably insanely shocked. Let's talk about it. Actually, let's go all Mormon sacrament meeting talk and start with a dictionary definition.

anniversary (noun): 1. the yearly recurrence of the date of a past event: the tenth anniversary of their marriage

2. the celebration or commemoration of such a date

(adjective):1. returning or recurring each year; annual

That's from dictionary.com, in case you were wondering.

So now, the pet peeve part. You do not have a six month anniversary of anything (dating, graduating from high school, being married, whatever). Anniversary comes from the term annual which means yearly. When someone says they've had a three month anniversary I want to punch them in the face (even people I like under normal circumstances). Instead try a phrase like, "She made me dinner to celebrate the fact that we've been dating for three months." I always think people sound like idiots when they misuse the word anniversary.

That is all.

Here's a picture of a dog nursing liger cubs in China because I'm pretty sure most blog posts should have pictures, and why not?

Fresh Ravioli

Sometimes I start feeling domestic (often) then I start thinking about delicious things I've made in the past and want to try again to make them bigger and better (minus the bigger part in most instances). So, today I again attempted homemade ravioli.

This is not a food blog so I don't have pictures of every step, but I did put some here for you to enjoy. And no, I don't have a recipe for filling. Except when I'm baking I don't normally operate from recipes.

First I heated up my frying pan to medium high, added about a tablespoon of vegetable oil (I'm poor so I don't have olive oil), and then cooked half a diced onion (I used white, just don't use red because that would look awful in my opinion and they're super strong, again my opinion) and a diced clove of garlic. I didn't cook it so long that it was all translucent or caramelized. I just got it a little tender.

Then I added about a pound of hamburger. When I did it before I used ground turkey and it was great (though I did use a little more oil because of the less fattiness of the meat). This time I used frozen burger patties from Costco (stop judging me immediately, this is ravioli filling, not a gourmet truffle-topped fancy something or another). I added salt, black pepper, garlic powder, onion powder, and LOTS of Italian seasoning because it is delicious. Cook it until it's all cooked, drain off the fat, and dump it into a bowl. At this point taste the meat because it might need some more spices. I like lots of flavor.

I know ricotta filling for ravioli is delicious. I love ricotta. I worship at the church of ricotta cheese. However, ricotta cheese is kind of pricey so I don't buy it. Instead I added some cream cheese (about 3/4 of a block in this case because I'd already used some on crackers) and mixed the heck out of it. Taste it now. Delicious (but maybe a little ugly).

A note: after I took this picture I added a handful of shredded mozzerella to the filling and mixed it in all thoroughly. I'm all for a good cheesy filling. Also, one time I tossed in a few diced up cooked mushrooms. Tasty.

So I stuck my filling in the fridge for awhile and made some pasta dough. About 2 cups of flour, a good shaking of salt, make a well just like they tell you on the Food Network. Then I beat three eggs with about a tablespoon or so of oil and two or three tablespoons of water. Pour about half of the wet into the well and start to mix. Slowly add some more wet until it's a good stiff (but not dry) dough. I've never used all the wet stuff, but I suppose it could change depending on where you live. Now knead it for about ten minutes. Seriously. I bet most of you have some relief society arm (better identified as wings) that you want to work off. This will do it.

Wrap your pretty dough in plastic, and put it in the fridge for an hour.

Now's a good time to take a picture of the apron your grandmother sent to you. Your roommates might judge you while you take this strange photo.

After an hour (during which you may have read a few chapters of East of Eden) get your dough out of the fridge, pull off half to use, and roll it out.

I used my fondant rolling pin because I can get more direct pressure exactly where I want it. Use whatever makes you happy.

As soon as you think your dough is thin and beautiful enough take a little break for thirty seconds then roll it until it's about twice as thin. Mine still wasn't quite as thin as I would have liked. Alternately, buy a pasta machine and save your arms.

Use a pizza cutter and cut off the edges, then cut the sheet in half.
Brush one sheet with egg wash then scoop on the filling. You can do little scoops at a time or use a frosting bag and a pair of scissors (which looks kind of sick). I like small raviolis, but I always fail.

Put the other pasta sheet on top...

And seal down all the edges: outsides and in-between. It's easiest if you start at one edge and move methodically to the other so you don't trap a bunch of air inside.
Cut the individual pieces apart. I used a fondant tool I had that sealed the edges and cut at the same time. I've also done the method where you separate them with a pizza cutter and then use a fork to seal the edges.
Pull the raviolis apart and stack them on a plate or something (but be careful if your dough is sticky that they don't get gummed together).
At this point you're going to have to set them aside while you do the other half of your pasta. Now send a picture to your mother. She will be proud. Boil some water and add a decent amount of salt. Cook your raviolis. Test one and make sure the pasta's done (mine always takes a little longer than I expect it to even though they say as soon as it floats it's done).

Serve your ravioli however you like it. Try some pesto, some parmesan (if you can afford fresh grated I am jealous of you), or some marinara (is marinara just one specific type or is all red sauce marinara?).

Now, eat up. It's delicious. Don't forget to take one or two or a few to your roommates to try. They will like you more that way.

If anyone out there actually made it through this post and decides to try their hand at fresh pasta because of it, let me know how it turns out. I'm truly interested.